Saturday morning, we lounged around for a while and worked on some wedding stuff. I can’t believe it’s coming up so soon! Ann has so many creative ideas and I can’t wait to see them all in one place at one time! It’s going to be beautiful. It’s been a rough road for her, so I know she’s excited to just get married, go on a much needed vacation and get away from all the drama. She definitely deserves it at this point!
I eventually rolled back into town and headed over to Jason’s. Things between us have been rough lately…and it’s mostly been my doing. I have a lot of stuff going on with my family right now and I’ve needed to deal with that in my own way. Unfortunately, this made me push Jason away and left him hurt and confused. After doing a lot of soul searching, I realized that I didn’t see myself marrying him for several reasons. The reasons were my own and not everyone understands them, but to me, they are valid. At this point, I had two options: I could go on ignoring that fact, or be upfront and honest with him. I chose the second. Jason sometimes reads this, so I’m not going to go over all the details out of respect for him. I’ll just say that he is a great guy…definitely the best I’ve dated. We had a great time together and there are so many things I like about him. But the cold, hard reality was that I couldn’t lead him on in false hope. I hope he knows that I didn’t go into this planning on hurting him and I’m SO sorry that it had to end this way. I really do hope that he and I can remain friends, but I understand that he’s not ready (or may not ever be ready) for that.
That kind of put a damper on my Saturday because no one likes to have those conversations. I called Megan (Jason’s best friend’s wife and my close friend) on the way home because I wanted her to hear what happened from me. As always, she was amazing and having been in a similar situation, she totally understood. Thank God for great friends.
I eventually put on my running shoes and went to relieve some stress. I hadn’t run the entire week so it was good to get back into it (I signed up for a 5k in less than a month!). It’s amazing how that will totally clear your head…it felt so good.
That night, my roommate and I went out. Amanda & I have lived together since July and hadn’t ever been in the same city over the weekends. This weekend, by all miracles, we were both in Chicago…and I needed to go OUT. So out we went! We hit up a couple Wicker Park/Bucktown bars…and it was a BLAST. I met some people from Indiana and had a great time meeting new people. It was a great way to take my mind off of everything. I have absolutely no clue what time we got home, but puppy & I fell into bed and didn’t wake up until 10am.
I stayed in my pajamas until at least five and then went to the grocery store. Coincidentally, ALL of the hot men in Wicker Park hang out at the Jewel on Sunday nights. Seriously…what is the deal with that!? I did run into my cousin and his girlfriend though. I love that I live in a place where that’s actually possible! I wrapped up the weekend with another run (Amanda came with me, too) and some episodes of How I Met Your Mother.
This week is getting busier by the second. I’m going to see Billy Elliot on Wednesday with Caitlin (Ben’s girlfriend) and am THRILLED at that! Then on Friday, I leave for N.A.S.H.V.I.L.L.E! Holy crap, I’m SO excited to see my friends and of course, Babykins!!
“After all, things change, so do cities, people come into your life and they go. But it's comforting to know that the ones you love are always in your heart... and if you're very lucky, a plane ride away” ~Carrie Bradshaw
No comments:
Post a Comment